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[bostic@okeeffe.Berkeley.EDU (Keith Bostic): The King in outer space.]

------- Forwarded Message

Date:    Mon, 27 Aug 90 12:36:31 -0700 
From:    bostic@okeeffe.Berkeley.EDU (Keith Bostic)
To:      /dev/null@okeeffe.Berkeley.EDU
Subject: The King in outer space.

ELVIS IN FREE FALL

Some clever devil worked up a chart showing how much ELVIS PRESLEY
would weigh at various sites in the solar system.  The King tipped the
scales at 255 when he died and, according to this chart, this means he
would weigh about:

	7,140 pounds on the Sun
	97    pounds on Mercury or Mars
	232   pounds on Venus or Uranus
	43    pounds on the Moon
	648   pounds on Jupiter
	275   pounds on Saturn
	303   pounds on Neptune
	13    pounds on Pluto

Chris Mojo, a New York guitarist, told reporters that he used to have
the chart on the back of his business cards.  He said he borrowed the
idea from Billy Gibbons, lead singer of the rock group ZZ Top.

Mojo added:  "Everybody told me that was the best opening line for
picking up women ever.  Like, `Do you know how much ELVIS would weigh
on Pluto?'"

The reporters took this information straight to Graceland, where they
found frowns of disapproval to be universal.  "It's really kind of
tasteless," sniffed Todd Morgan, a spokesman for that gaudy mecca.  "We
have a lot more important things to worry about..."

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