[Prev][Next][Index]

Holiday gifts

It's that holiday time of year again, and I know how some of you
struggle to find unusual gifts for that special someone.  So, here are
some ideas taken from the back of some of my magazines.  Note that I
haven't ordered from these services (or won't admit to same), so I
can't say anything about the service or quality of goods.  Caveat
yuckster.

--spaf

Farm raised & processed, fresh-frozen alligator meat.  2 16oz packages
of alligator nuggets only $29.95 plus $8.50 shipping.  Recipes
included.  Call Alligator Bob's Gourmet Alligator @ 1-800-342-1217

Panty-of-the-month club.  Order "elegantly designer panty ...
beautifully gift-wrapped, delicately perfumed, and enclosed with a
personal note reflecting the holiday or season at hand."  Right.  You
can enroll your giftee for 3, 6, or 12 months of panties.  No mention
of a "boxershorts-of-the-month" for the distaff giver.  Call
1-718-PANTIES (1-718-726-8437) or 212-340-4169 for details & order
information. 

Sauce-of-the-month club.  $130 a year gets you a sauce each month from
Spectacular Sauces of Alexandria VA.  They have an extensive catalog
too, available for $1.50 from 800-999-4949.  Just the thing to top off
the alligator nuggets, and maybe the panties.

$14.95 to Chris Leighton, 4022 Corliss Ave. N, Seattle WA 98103
allegedly will bring you a 30 minute tape of "Slim Sphincter the
Farting Elf" performing 30 minutes of farted Xmas song.  I would
imagine that "It Came Upon a Midnight Clear" would be awesome, but
I'll stick to the sauces (I almost said I'd stick to the panties, but
I'm sure that would provoke some interesting reactions).

$3.95 to Tenn. Woods, Rt. 9, Box 307A, Sevierville TN 37862 will get
you a can of sun-dried Tennessee Possum road-kill.  Yum, yum.  Slim
eats it all the time to fuel his, er, singing.

I'll send more if/when I come across them....