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There goes the neighborhood...

------- Forwarded Message

[Los Angeles] Daily News, July 12:

Don't try fixing your spaceship in your back yard, especially if you live 
in Fremont, California.  According to a Fremont ordinance, it's illegal to 
repair a vehicle in a residential zone.  This includes not only automobiles 
but also "vessels, aircraft and spacecraft."  In compliance with the law, 
Fremont's Mayor, Gus Morrison, who helps make spacecraft for Lockheed 
Missiles & Space Co., has promised not to take his work home.

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In Fairfield, California, 23 students in the American Studies class at 
Fairfield High made a door-to-door survey in the residential section, 
carrying what they described as "a possible amendment to the Constitution" 
... "Unconstitutional," was one citizen's reaction after reading it.  
Another: "Gibberish."  A third volunteered that "This would increase the 
sale of marijuana" and a fourth scoffed "Sounds like SDS stuff to me"

... Of the 850 Fairfield residents contacted, only 290 thought the proposed 
amendment should become part of the Constitution and only only EIGHT PER 
CENT recognized that it actually WAS a verbatim copy of the First Amendment 
to the Constitution ... Report John Silva, who wrote an excellent piece 
about this incident for the Vallejo Times-Herald, adds that "one top 
Fairfield official refused to sign it, and his wife begged off, explaining 
that her husband's job forbade it."

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Several years ago, a major meat packer decided to run a series of radio
commercials.  The idea was to hold contests on radio stations in which the
first 10 callers would win large supplies of sirloin steaks.  So they hired
a market researcher to prepare a report on how the whole thing should be run.

The report contained a paragraph like so --

	After careful research, we feel that an appropriate name
	for the contest would be "High Steaks."  We believe that
	the majority of radio listeners are intelligent enough
	to understand the double entendre.  The only geographical 
	area in which we found the intellectual sophistication 
	lacking is Memphis, TN, and there we recommend that you call
	the contest "Free Meat."

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