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Yucks Digest V1 #86



Yucks Digest                Tue, 24 Sep 91       Volume 1 : Issue  86 

Today's Topics:
                    Accident Victim Misidentified
                                cutie
   DB: QUIETLY PUTTING A PRODUCT CALLED 'BEANO' TO THE SUPREME TEST
                             Eastern Joke
                           Just Say Blammo!
                              Longevity
                          Mathematics, etc.
                    The Macross Beer Can (2 msgs)
                           WhiteBoard News
    GERBILMANIA: everything you wanted to know but were afraid...

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possibly insane, and the (usually) humorous.  It is issued on a
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----------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: Mon, 23 Sep 91 01:29:58 PDT
From: one of our correspondants
Subject: Accident Victim Misidentified
To: yucks-request

   HARRISBURG, Pa. (AP)
   Funeral arrangements were being made and relatives mourned for
Denise Dieter, a 23-year-old law student identified by her stepfather
and grandfather as the victim of a car accident.
   But as the family gathered in her father's home near Philadelphia
on Sept. 15, Ms. Dieter walked into her apartment in Harrisburg. Her
startled roommate said, "You'd better call your dad."
   The crash the day before had obliterated the female victim's face.
She had striking similarities to Ms. Dieter, who was supposed to have
been in the car en route to a picnic but had changed her mind at the
last minute.
   The victim, Cindy Bowers, was the same height and weight as Ms.
Dieter. They had the same hair color and were wearing identical hair
barrettes. They both had double-pierced ears, were wearing the same
earrings and had similar key rings.
   "It was really bizarre and weird," Ms. Dieter said in a telephone
interview.
   Ms. Dieter said that when she walked into her Harrisburg apartment
that Sunday, her roommate, Jackie Rodriquez, became hysterical and
could only blurt out for Ms. Dieter to call her father.
   "I thought somebody in my family died," Ms. Dieter said.
   When Ms. Dieter called her father's home, her stepmother, Patti
Dieter, answered.
   "I said, `Hey Patti, What's up?"' Ms. Dieter recalled. "She was
stunned. She said, `Denise, they're planning your funeral. Where the
hell are you?'
   "My father grabbed the phone, he was hysterical. He kept saying,
`Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.' At this point, I knew they thought
I was dead."
   Ms. Dieter, a second-year student at Widener Law School's
Harrisburg campus, had been invited to a picnic to hobnob with
lawyers.
   "I called and said I wasn't going," she said. "I don't know why. I
wasn't tired or sick, I just didn't feel like going."
   Ms. Bowers went in her place, along with two men.
   Ms. Bowers, 29, and one of the men were killed when their car left
the highway on a curve, police said. The other man was in serious
condition Sunday at the Robert Packer Hospital in Bradford County, a
spokeswoman said.

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 23 Sep 91 09:05:45 EDT
From: dscatl!lindsay@gatech.edu
Subject: cutie

  How did it ever happen that, when the dregs of the world had
collected in Western Europe, when the Goths and the Franks and the
Normans and the Lombards had mingled with the rot of old Rome to
form a patchwork of hybred races, all notable for feroctiy, hatred,
stupidity, craftiness, lust and brutality -- how did it happen that
from all this, there should come the Gregorian chant, cathedrals,
the poems of Prudentius, the commentaries and histories of Bede,
St. Augustine's "City of God"?

  -- Thomas Merton

[Hmm, I wonder what great religious works will come out of the
South Bronx?  --spaf]

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 23 Sep 91 12:51:15 -0700
From: bostic@okeeffe.CS.Berkeley.EDU (Keith Bostic)
Subject: DB: QUIETLY PUTTING A PRODUCT CALLED 'BEANO' TO THE SUPREME TEST
To: /dev/null@okeeffe.CS.Berkeley.EDU

QUIETLY PUTTING A PRODUCT CALLED 'BEANO' TO THE SUPREME TEST
	-- by Dave Barry [09/22/91]

        Recently I received a letter from a justice of the United
    States Supreme Court concerning a product called "Beano."

        I absolutely swear I am not making this up.  The letter,
    written on official US Supreme Court stationery, comes from
    Justice John Paul Stevens, who states:

        "Having long been concerned about the problem of exploding
    cows, it seemed imperative to pass on to you the enclosed adver-
    tisement, the importance of which I am sure will be immediately 
    apparent to you."

        Justice Stevens enclosed an advertisement from Cooking Light
    magazine for Beano, which, according to the manufacturer, "pre-
    vents the gas from beans."  The advertisement includes pro-Beano
    quotations from various recognized intestinal-gas authorities,
    including (I am still not making this up) The New York Times, The
    Idaho Statesman and Regis Philbin.  The advertisement calls Beano
    "a scientific and social breakthrough," and states: "It's time to
    spill the Beano."

        I was already aware of this product.  I don't wish to toot my
    own horn, so to speak, but thanks to the efforts of hundreds of
    alert readers, my office happens to be the World Clearing House
    for information relating to gas buildups that cause explosions in
    animals, plants, plumbing, humans, etc.  In recent months, I've
    received newspaper reports of explosions involving a flounder, a
    marshallow, a mattress, two wine bottles, several pacemakers
    (during cremation), countless toilets, a flaming cocktail called a
    "harbor light," chicken livers, snail eggs, a turkey, a tube of
    Poppin' Fresh Biscuits, a raccoon and a set of breast implants.

        So needless to say, many readers had already alerted me about
    Beano.  Several of them had sent me actual samples of Beano, which
    comes in a small plastic bottle, from which you squirt drops onto
    your food.  But until I got Justice Stevens' letter, I had not
    realized that this was a matter of concern in the highest levels
    of government.  When you see the Supreme Court justices, they al-
    ways appear to be extremely solemn, if not actually deceased.  It
    never occurs to you that, under those robes, they have digestive 
    systems, too.  But they do, as can be seen by a careful reading of 
    the transcript of a recent court hearing:

        CHIEF JUSTICE REHNQUIST:  Is the court to understand, then,
    that the counsel's interpretation of the statute is. ...All right! 
    Who sliced the Limburger? (He glares at the other justices.)

        JUSTICE SCALIA:  Well, I am not naming names, but I happened
    to be glancing at the liberal wing of the court, and I definitely
    saw some robes billow, if you catch my drift.

        JUSTICE BLACKMUM:  Oh, sure, and I suppose the conservative
    wing doesn't sound like The All-Star Kazoo Band over there.  My
    opinions are blowing off the bench.

        JUSTICE O'CONNOR:  Oh yeah?  Well why don't you take your
    opinions and....

        This is bad for America.  We need our highest judicial body to
    stop this childish bickering and get back to debating the kinds of
    weighty constitutional issues that have absorbed the court in
    recent years, such as whether a city can legally force an exotic
    dancer to cover her entire nipple, or just the part that pokes
    out.

        So I decided, as a tax-deductible public service, to do a
    Beano Field Test.  To  make sure the test was legally valid, I
    asked a friend of mine, Paul Levine, who's a trained attorney as
    well as an author, if he'd paticipate.  Paul is a selfless,
    concerned citizen, so I was not surprised at his answer.

        "Only if you mention that my critically acclaimed novel 'To
    Speak for the Dead' is now available in paperback," he said.

        "I'm afraid I can't do that," I said.  But Paul agreed to
    participate in the Field Test anyway, because that is the kind of
    American he is.  My wife, Beth, also agreed to participate, al-
    though I want to stress that, being a woman, she has never, ever, 
    in her entire life, not once, produced any kind of gaseous diges-
    tive byproduct, and when she does she blames it on the dogs.

        To make this the most demanding field test possible, we went
    to a Mexican restaurant.  Mexican restaurants slip high-octane
    beans into virtually everything they serve, including breath
    mints.  It is not by mere chance that most of Mexico is located
    outdoors.

        Paul, Beth and I applied the Beano to our food as directed -
    three to eight drops per serving - and we ate it.  For the rest of
    the evening, we wandered around to various night spots, awaiting
    developments. Other people at these night spots were probably
    having exciting, romantic conversatons, but ours went like this:

        ME:  So! How's everyone doing?

        BETH:  All quiet!

        PAUL:  Not a snap, crackle or pop!

        Anyway, the bottom (Har!) line is that Beano seems to work
    pretty well.  Paul reported the next day that all had been fairly
    calm, although at 3:30 a.m. he was awakened by an outburst.  "You
    are familiar with the Uzi?" was how he put it.  I myself was far
    safer than usual to light a match around, and Beth reported that
    the dogs had been unusually quiet.

        So this could be an important product.  Maybe, when you go to 
    a restaurant, if you order certain foods, the waiter should bring
    Beano to your table, instead of those stupid utility-pole-sized
    pepper grinders.  "Care for some Beano?" the waiter could say. 
    "Trust me, you'll need it."

        And getting back to Justice Stevens' original concern, I think
    federal helicopters should spray massive quantities of Beano on
    the nation's dairy farms, to reduce the cow methane output.  And,
    of course, it should be mandatory in the dining rooms of the
    United States Congress.  I'm sure the Supreme Court will back me
    up on this.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 22 Sep 91 11:28:40 EDT
From: Mikel Manitius <mikel@aaahq01.aaa.com>
Subject: Eastern Joke
To: Frequent-Flyer@ames.arc.nasa.gov (Frequent Flyer Mailing List)

Here's an old Eastern Airlines joke, sorry if you've already heard it.

Two business men walk into an airport hotel bar after work and order a
drink. One notices two stewardesses at the other end of the bar and
pursuades his friend to to go try to "pick up" one of them.

His friend makes his way over to them, and sais:

"Hey, you look familiar... No, wait, don't tell me, you're Something Special
In The Air, right?"

Stewardess: "What?"

Man: "I know, you're from The Friendly Skies!"

Stewardess: "Huh?"

Man: "You Love To Fly And It Shows!"

Stewardess: "What the hell do you want?"

Man: "Oh shit, you're from Eastern."

(Ba-bum)

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 23 Sep 91 12:53:07 -0700
From: bostic@okeeffe.CS.Berkeley.EDU (Keith Bostic)
Subject: Just Say Blammo!
To: /dev/null@okeeffe.CS.Berkeley.EDU

This is an editorial from the Lawrence Journal-World.  It appears to be
written by the J-W editorial staff.  The paper was dated Thursday
September 19, 1991.

Constitutional questions

   It sounds like something out of a Tom Clancy novel.

   If tests being conducted in the area of Palm Beach Shores, Fla., are
successful, U.S. authorities may consider adding mobile rocket launchers
to fight drug smugglers.  The Army Missle Command is working with the
Florida Army National Guard on non-firing tests of radar-guided rockets,
according to Maj. Bill Douglas of the National Guard.  Last year, the
Bush administration sought authority to force down airplanes suspected of
carrying narcotics, although it stopped short of seeking the power to
shoot the planes down.  Now federal, state and local law enforcement
officials are due to watch a non-firing demonstration of the weapons
system and tell the Army whether they think the equipment will work in
anti-drug operations, Douglas said.

   "Planes will fly typical patterns of drug smugglers and we'll see how
it goes," he said.  After law enforcement officials critique the system's
performance, the Army will decide whether the weapons should be added to
the war on drugs, Douglas said.  It remains to be seen how radar-guided
rockets would perform in the real world of drug pilots and their
low-flying, evasive maneuvers, he said.  But Douglas, who is a pilot, had
his own reaction.  "I'd hate to be flying against it."

   It is no suprise that there are strong critics of the tests.

   "My God, no, we're not involved," says John Wagner, second in command
of the West Palm Beach office of the U.S. Drug Enforcement
Administration.  "We at DEA work within the framework of the law, and
shooting down an unidentified aircraft -- albeit a drug plane -- is not
within that framework."

   West Palm Beach attorney Jim Green, legal director of the Florida
American Civil Liberties Union, is even more harsh.  "So, they're going
to try the occupants of the planes without a jury, convict them and then
execute them," Green said.  "I wonder if there are any constitutional
questions there?"

   It was in Clancy's book, "A Clear and Present Danger," that renegades
in Washington triggered a drug-busting operation in Colombia which posted
mixed reviews considering legal, ethical and moral issues.  Could the
Florida experimients be a spinoff of that premise, or was Clancy simply
ahead of his time?

   While the idea of hitting drug-runners, hitting them hard and putting
them out of business is appealing to a large majority of Americans, there
are, as the ACLU legal director pointed out, some rather important
constitutional questions to answer before things go much further.

------------------------------

Date: 20 Sep 91 17:13:55 GMT
From: ekirby@buckeye.boeing.com (Elizabeth Kirby)
Subject: Longevity
Newsgroups: sci.med

[...preliminary stuff deleted...  Looks like time for the net-Vegan
to re-register.  --spaf]

The 31st of January is "Alien Day."  That's the deadline by which all 
aliens (i.e., non-U.S. citizens residing in the USA) are required to 
register their addresses with the U.S. Post Office.

A bunch of science-fiction fans dressed in costumes of their favorite 
BEMs (bug-eyed monsters) from outer space went to the main post office 
in Bloomington, Indiana and demanded alien-registration forms.

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 24 Sep 91 08:39:22 CDT
From: Joe Wiggins <JWIGG@UAFSYSB.UARK.EDU>
Subject: Mathematics, etc.
To: yucks

Here are some miscellaneous thoughts sent to me by a friend at USC.  Some
are good, some are not.  [THAT's for sure!  --spaf]

A topologist walks into a bar and orders a drink.  The bartender, being a
number theorist, says, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve topologists here."

The disgruntled topologist walks outside, but then gets an idea and performs
Dahn surgery upon herself.  She walks into the bar, and the bartender,
who does not recognize her since she is now a different manifold, serves her
a drink.  However, the bartender thinks she looks familiar, or at least
locally similiar, and asks, "Aren't you that topologist that just came in here?"

To which she responds, "No, I'm a frayed knot."

Q:  How many topologists does it take to change a light bulb?
A:  It really doesn't matter, since they'd rather knot.

Q:  What do you call a teapot of boiling water on top of mount everest?
A:  A HIGH-POT-IN-USE

Q:  What do you call a broken record?
A:  A Decca-gone

What follows is a "quiz" a student of mine once showed me (which she'd
gotten from a previous teacher, etc...)  It's multiple choice,
and if you sort the letters (with upper and lower case disjoint,
ie on an ASCII machine) questions and answers will come out next to each
other.  Enjoy...

 S. What the acorn said when he grew up
 N.                                                     bisects
 u. A dead parrot
 g.                                                     center
 F. What you should do when it rains
 R.                                                     hypotenuse
 m. A guy who has been to the beach
 H.                                                     coincide
 h. The set of cards is missing
 y.                                                     polygon
 A. The boy has a speech defect
 t.                                                     secant
 K. How they schedule gym class
 p.                                                     tangent
 b. What he did when his mother-in-law wanted to go home
 D.                                                     ellipse
 O. The tall kettle boiling on the stove
 W.                                                     geometry
 r. Why the girl doesn't run a 4-minute mile
 j.                                                     decagon

A team of engineers were required to measure the height of a flag pole.
They only had a measuring tape, and were getting quite frustrated trying
to keep the tape along the pole.  It kept falling down, etc.

A mathematician comes along, finds out their problem, and proceeds to
remove the pole from the ground and measure it easily.

When he leaves, one engineer says to the other:  "Just like a
mathematician!  We need to know the height, and he gives us the length!"

A group of scientists were doing an investigation into problem-solving
techniques, and constructed an experiment involving a physicist, an
engineer, and a mathematician.

The experimental apparatus consisted of a water spigot and two identical
pails, one of which was fastened to the ground ten feet from the spigot.

Each of the subjects was given the second pail, empty, and told to fill
the pail on the ground.

The physicist was the first subject:  he carried his pail to the spigot,
filled it there, carried it full of water to the pail on the ground, and
poured the water into it.  Standing back, he declared, "There: I have
solved the problem."

The engineer and the mathematician each approached the problem similarly.
Upon finishing, the engineer noted that the solution was exact, since the
volumes of the pails were equal.  The mathematician merely noted that he
had proven that a solution exists.

Now, the experimenters altered the parameters of the task a bit:  the pail
on the ground was still empty, but the subjects were presented with a pail
that was already half-filled with water.

The physicist immediately carried his pail over to the one on the ground,
emptied the water into it, went back to the spigot, *filled* the pail, and
finally emptied the entire contents into the pail on the ground, overflowing
it and spilling some of the water.  Upon finishing, he commented that the
problem should have been better stated.

The engineer, in turn, thought for some time before going into action.  He
then took his half-filled pail to the spigot, filled it to the brim, and
filled the pail on the ground from it.  Again he noted that the problem
had an exact solution, which of course he had found.

The mathematician thought for a long time before stirring.  At last he
stood up, emptied his pail onto the ground, and declared, "The problem has
been reduced to one already solved."

A mathematician, a physicist and an engineer were in a train crossing
from England into Scotland. Looking out of the window they saw a black sheep.

"Scottish sheep are black!" commented the engineer
"No, no" said the physicist, "all we can tell is that _some_ Scottish
sheep are black."
The mathematician looked at both of then with withering disdain, "There
is, in Scotland, at least one sheep, at least one side of which is black."

------------------------------

Date: 18 Sep 91 20:07:49 GMT
From: (name lost)
Subject: The Macross Beer Can

...

Not to mention the special effects guy at Industrial Light and Magic who
got annoyed during Return of the Jedi and inserted a sneaker into the
mass space battle scene at the end.  It comes by so fast you can't see
it, but look closely in slow motion and you'll find it. ...

------------------------------

Date: 17 Sep 91 20:04:16 GMT
From: ketter@MDI.COM (Cindy Ketterling)
Subject: The Macross Beer Can
Newsgroups: rec.arts.anime

... I see it more as the same sort of thing George Lucas did
in "Empire Strikes Back" when he put a potato in the asteroid
field.  (It's there, kiddies ... we found it!) ...

------------------------------

Date: Mon Sep 23 18:15:50 PDT 1991
From: t-robtp@microsoft.COM
Subject: WhiteBoard News
To: 0003539738@mcimail.com, QUA@cornella.cit.cornell.edu,

[compiled by JoeHa@microsoft.com]

Miami, FL

"A copywriter for an aerial-banner advertising firm in Miami,
Fla., proposed the following sell copy to the owner of a local
carpet store: 

"Don't beat your wife, beat your rug." 

The carpet-store owner began to laugh so hard that he swallowed
his cigarette and had to be taken to the hospital."
==========

EDWARDS AIR FORCE BASE, Calif - The space shuttle
Discovery thundered across the heart of California in the dark
early Wednesday and landed under searchlights after a mission to
launch a satellite to study Earth's atmosphere.   

"That was a most EXCELLENT adventure," pilot Kenneth
Reightler, Jr., said of the mission after the crew returned to
Houston.

Discovery's primary mission was the successful launch of the
$740 million Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite which will
study how pollutants deplete the ozone layer shielding Earth from
ultraviolet sunlight that can cause skin cancer.
==========

Bellevue, WA

There's a story circulating through the Bellevue School District
about the woman who called wanting information on home
schooling.

Both Lake Washington (Renton, WA) and Bellevue districts are
noted for their support of home schoolers, and the Bellevue
spokesperson was explaining procedures and what to do to the
mother on the telephone.

Among other things, the mother needed to file a declaration of
intent, a kind of home school registration.  The spokeswoman
offered to send out the proper form.

The mother gave a Renton address.

The spokeswoman suggested registering the children in her home
district in Renton, the Lake Washington School District.

"No way," said the mother.  "Everyone knows Bellevue schools
are much better than Renton schools."
==========

Bellevue, WA

Police say two officers tried to stop a car when the driver jumped
out and fled from the scene.

The car continued on into a swamp just off the road where it
came to rest in two feet of water.  

A canine unit was dispatched and, a short time later, the dog,
Sam, found the suspect under water holding his breath.

The soaking-wet suspect was taken to a nearby hospital for
treatment of small dog bites and then booked into the King
County jail.
==========

Barnswell, SC

A man whose car struck the back of a pickup truck had a dead
woman sitting beside him, police said.

Franklin Dewey Hutson, 49, was charged with murder after the
collision.

Barnswell County Coroner Joe Ridgeway said the pickup truck's
driver called police after the crash because he say the dead
woman inside.

She had been killed earlier in the day by a gunshot wound to the
chest.

------------------------------

Date: 18 Sep 91 16:25:08 GMT
From: jacob@Alliant.COM (Lou Jacob)
Subject: GERBILMANIA: everything you wanted to know but were afraid...
Newsgroups: alt.sex.bestiality

[The following is not for the faint of heart.   --spaf]

This article is from a syndicated column called, The Straight Dope, and
was written by Cecil Adams.  It was published in the Chicago Reader,
sometime in 1986.

THE STRAIGHT DOPE

> While discussing a gay acquaintance recently, my friend Mary, a nurse,
> lauded him by adding, "and he's no damn gerbil stuffer, either."  When I
> protested that she should not perpetuate cruel stereotypes of our
> homosexual brethren, she informed me that she personally had witnessed a
> fellow admitted by her hospital to remove a deceased gerbil lodged in his
> rectum.  That gentleman is now doomed to be tied to a colostomy bag
> through eternity.  What I'd like to know is, what are the mechanics and
> philosophy of gerbil stuffing?  How are the gerbils inserted and
> retrieved?  Don't they bite and scratch?  Why not hamsters or snakes?  Is
> this a common practice?  My curious friends and I await your reply with
> bated breath. -- Shannon O'Hara, W. Thomas

Let's face it, toots, an awful lot of stuff has been found where that
gerbil was found.  The medical journals list an astonishing array: a
bottle of Mrs. Butterworth's syrup, an ax handle, a nine-inch zucchini,
countless didoes and vibrators including one 14-inch model complete with
two D-cell batteries, a plastic spatula, a 9 1/2-inch water bottle, a
deodorant bottle, a Coke bottle, a large bottle cap, numerous other
bottles, a 3 1/2-inch Japanese glass float ball, an 11-inch carrot, an
antenna rod, a 150-watt light bulb, a 100-watt frosted bulb, a cucumber,
a screwdriver, four rubber balls, 72 1/2 jeweler's saws (all from one
patient, but not all at the same time, although 29 were discovered on one
occasion), a paperweight, an apple, an onion, a plastic toothbrush
package, two bananas, a frozen pig's tail (it got stuck when it thawed),
a ten-inch length of broomstick, an 18-inch umbrella handle and central
rod, a plantain encased in a condom, two Vaseline jars, a whiskey bottle
with a cord attached, a teacup, an oil can, a six-by-five-inch tool box
weighing 22 ounces, a six-inch stone weighing two pounds (in the latter
two cases the patients died due to intestinal obstruction), a baby powder
can, a test tube, a ball-point pen, a peanut butter jar, candles,
baseballs, a sand-filled bicycle inner tube, sewing needles, a
flashlight, a half-filled tobacco pouch, a turnip, a pair of eyeglasses,
a hard-boiled egg, a carborundum grindstone (with handle), a suitcase
key, a syringe, a file tumblers and glasses, a polyethylene waste trap
from the U-bench of a sink, and so on.  In 1955 one man who was "feeling
depressed" reportedly inserted a six-inch paper tube into his rectum,
dropped in a lighted firecracker, and blew a hole in his anterior rectal
wall.  This changed his mood multo rapido.

As for live or recently deceased fauna, rumors of gerbil (and mouse or
hamster) stuffing have been circulating since about 1982, and I know of
at least one case, in 1984, when a Denver weekly printed a confirmed
report of gerbilectomy in a local emergency room.  Unfortunately, such
cases have been slow in making their way into the formal literature of
medicine.  I have checked with numerous sources, including gays, doctors,
and your nurse friend, and though everybody has heard about gerbil
stuffing, there is no consensus on how it is accomplished or how often it
occurs.  The principle is simple: a tube is inserted in the rectum, and a
recently manicured gerbil is induced to run up the tube and burrow in.
There's some difference of opinion about what happens next.  Some say the
gerbil somehow winds up in a bag or sack (perhaps a condom?); others say
no sack is used - the gerbil simply squirms around, eventually dies of
suffocation, and is later eliminated during defecation.  The kick
supposedly is the sensation of fur.  I am skeptical about this, but let's
face it, I am skeptical about this whole damn business.  I should note
that there are nerve endings only in the lower extremities of the rectum,
and thus there is nothing to be gained by shoveling extended families of
gerbils into your lower quadrant.  A word to the wise.

Complications often occur.  Often the rectum and/or anus becomes
lacerated, torn, or infected.  (The Manhattan publication _New York Talk_
reported about a year ago that New York doctors first caught on to
stuffing when they started encountering patients with infections
previously found only in rodents.)  More generally, chronic insertion of
objects (or fists, for that matter) can result in a flaccid anus, a major
turn-off in my book.  Cecil sternly advises caution.  And stick to
mammals your own size.

- Cecil Adams

Note: A friend of mine is in med-school and he showed me a table from one
      of medical journals.  About 95% of the stuff listed in this article
      was in those tables.

      My skepticism about the integrity of this article evaporated,
      "multo rapido."

------------------------------

End of Yucks Digest
------------------------------